And the story is definitely better this time around! I have grown a lot as a writer since two years ago and I'm much better at adding failure points into my story. Some of them have been purposeful, others came about because I forgot to mention a thing earlier on and I realise if I continue to ignore it then it adds another layer of complexity for my chracters. Laziness and better writing!
It also helps that I had a couple friends look over it before I started rewriting so I have a better idea of what set up stuff was unneeded and where I need to elaborate. My villain has at least two new scenes! I'm also forcing myself to keep track of POVs as I go so that they are more consistant and I can make sure to feature everyone.
So on this last day of November, I have written the 50k, but I estimate I have another 1/3 of the story left to write. I set myself a deadline of Feburary. We'll see how that goes. I guess I should get back to writing.
Quick preview of a spot I changed in the second revision:
Hannah heard a voice and looked up to see a human hand holding out the other stone. However, the rest of his body was not entirely human shaped. Gills in his neck were the first clue, but it was the long grey tail that gave it away. His scales glinted dimly in the light filtered through the water as he tail slowly moved back and forth to keep him in place.
“Thank you,” Hannah said as she gently took the stone.
Nadir asked something, but not in any language Hannah understood. So many people spoke Common, she forgot that she was limited by language in the future. On Earth too, but that was less relevant right now. More importantly, the merman seemed to understand Nadir. They carried on a brief conversation before Nadir turned to Hannah.
“You couldn’t understand that?” he asked in Common.
“Nope. Sounded a little like Italian, but I only know how to say ‘your butt is made of cheese’ so that’s not actually useful.”
Nadir threw his head back and laughed before translating for the elderly merman.
